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Love and Fights

by Jason Renslow

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1.
I Wrote You A Letter I want to hold your hand while walking in the moon light I want to be your man in the darkest of nights I want to hold you when you get so blue And I want to love you when the mornin' is new But, if it's too late, I can understand You're gonna show me what a country song can mean to a country man I can say I've been there, I've had some lonely nights Sometimes I have made choices that I could have made more right I have looked to the sky and I have seen the rain clouds I've looked in the mirror and not always been proud Sometimes loving means leaving and doing what you've got to do And, when I look back there's no regrettin' But, some days I'm still in love with you Sometimes love means you hold on to whatever you've got to hold And, love means doing you no wrong I'm gonna need you when I get old And I want all the best for you more than I want it for myself At least I got this bottle of whiskey staring at me down from the shelf The answers I seek are blurred, they don't deal in "yes's" and "no's" But, I'm here for you any time, this is something I know I know Sometimes loving means leaving and doing what you've got to do And, when I look back there's no regrettin' But, some days I'm still in love with you Sometimes love means you hold on to whatever you've got to hold And, love means doing you no wrong We're gonna need each other when we get old
2.
New Guy 01:41
New Guy That new boyfriend of yours, does he feel like me? Does he breathe like me? Does he need like me? Does he see like me? That new boyfriend of yours, does he hold like me? Does he sleep like me? Does he believe like me? Does he please like me? I'd swear it's not my thing to disappoint But, maybe you'd swear that I missed the point Swear to my face, go and swear to the sky Swear you don't miss me when you're with the new guy That new boyfriend of yours, does he know like me? Does he grow like me? Is he free like me? Does he trust like me? That new boyfriend of yours, does he love like me? Does he touch like me? Does he give like me? Does he demand like me? I'd swear it's not my thing to disappoint But, maybe you'd swear that I missed the point Swear to my face, go and swear to the sky Swear you don't miss me when you're with the new guy That new boyfriend of yours, does he bleed like me? Does he cheat like me? Has he greed like me? Will he leave like I left you?
3.
Picture In A Picture Frame I might have to wait until next time I might have to wait until my next life I know I'll get along just fine I might have to suffer a little, go on into the night Before you go, before you leave Please, oh won't you, promise me one thing Before you decide to deceive, before you take it now, what you need Please won't you fall in love one time with me I look at all that you resemble Look at all we could become At the edge I'll look down and tremble Where we're going and where we've come from Before you go, before you leave Please, oh won't you, promise me one thing Before you decide to deceive, before you take it now, what you need Please won't you fall in love one time with me I keep that one time picture on my shelf in a picture frame I'll say "no" when asked if I miss her Somehow I know I just have myself to blame Before you go, before you leave Please, oh won't you, promise me one thing Before you decide to deceive, before you take it now, what you need Please won't you fall in love one time with me
4.
L & F 03:03
L & F Love and fights... when you love someone, but still decide to go on fighting when you love someone, but still can't agree on what's the right thing when you can't give in because of something you gotta hold on to when you keep on fighting even though you really don't want to Loving and fighting... becomes part of routine becomes a normal thing a privilege or a right? Can you live with loving and fighting every night? Love and fights... the belief that no matter what you'll be more right you know you'll never give in, but your partner might doing your best to defend your comfort zone when nothing is more important than the ego Loving and fighting... is part of who I am as much as I can stand collection of my wounds may end up as my doom
5.
Sometime Later How did you get so jaded? How did you lose your shine? Did the drinking finally catch up? Or, was it just the passing of time? Because the woman that you were used to be everything to me and, now I find that so hard to believe The woman that you were used to be everything I could need whatever happened to that woman I knew who was free? You used to tell me that you had dreams, used to think you were something But now those days are gone it seems and it all just amounts to nothing Because the woman that you were used to be everything to me and, now I find that so hard to believe The woman that you were used to be everything I could need whatever happened to that woman I knew who was free? Sometimes the lights go down It seems there's nothing to be done But, when the lights go down It's a chance to turn around So, the next time we see each other Is there a chance I'll see you doing better? Because the woman that you were used to be everything to me and, now I find that so hard to believe The woman that you were used to be everything I could need whatever happened to that woman I knew who was free?
6.
I Have A House This world is gray Sometimes I have more debts than I could ever pay But, there are so many shades We could go, we could run away I have a house, that steals away my kisses I have a girl, who says I fill her wishes I have a woman, who tries to tell me what to do Then, darlin'... I have you I see an end disaster, but it's hard to know what you're trying to capture I hope you get what you're after, hope you figure out for you what really matters I have a house, that steals away my kisses I have a girl, who says I fill her wishes I have a woman, who tries to tell me what to do Then darlin'... I have you The luck of the draw is never enough The road that we walk is paved with our tears Decisions that we make, they will carry us on and home again For you I would do anything, find rules to bend All the gold in the end, well it won't amount to anything But, the hearts that we touch build a life that's worth living All the gold in the end, well it won't amount to anything But, the hearts that we touch build a life that's worth living
7.
Talk Loud Walk Proud Sometimes I get to wondering how a girl like you got so lucky To be here in the here and now with me as your man Sometimes I got to sum it up, sometimes I don't really got the words So I get out a sweet guitar song and sometimes it ain't in me, babe It's a G n' R kinda thing When the forces of good and evil, they collide Something emerges from deep inside Gotta live it up, one helluva ride Blues get on my mind some nights, do what I can to get stuff right Tonight some things gone leave me burned what I learn, what I second guess It's a G n' R kinda thing When the forces of good and evil, they collide Something emerges from deep inside Gotta live it up, like you don't have to try Gotta live it up, like tomorrow you're gonna die Gotta live it up
8.
Everlasting Glow Can I be in the backdrop of all your life I've got left to live? This may seem like a lot to ask, but I think I've got a lot to give And I want to share everything that I know with you And I want to go everywhere that I go with you And, I want you to know that I believe in you You're everything I could want in a woman so true Can I be in the car riding shotgun in the sun? An open road where we can go, we're together now so we have won And I want to share everything that I know with you And I want to go everywhere that I go with you And, I want you to know that I believe in you You're everything I could want in a woman so true Oh the years, they have let me know that I should never let you go Oh the years, they have let me know that I should never let you go And I want you to know that I can see an everlasting glow
9.
The Crash And The Burn First and foremost, let me start by saying that your happiness means everything to me And secondly, I'd like to follow up And let you know that you mean everything So, while the rest of the world goes a driftin' on back and forth I get sad and it's hard now to say why 'cause it seems to reach your satisfaction you need to speculate on what we would be If our world was to crash and burn if our world was to die Third on my mind, I'm thinking all the time I want to express you you what it is that I feel in my heart Fourth on my mind, actually in no right order The more I think about us, well, I just don't want to be apart So, while the rest of the world goes a driftin' on back and forth I get sad and it's hard now to say why 'cause it seems to reach your satisfaction you need to speculate on what we would be If our world was to crash and burn if our world was to die
10.
Summer Song 2013 (Damn you, Jason... it's been a bastard) Sometimes the taste of a cigarette is a reminder to me of being young Of parking lots and star lit nights, and sometimes it reminds me of you So many secrets, I keep too locked away Too many projects, I've left undone So many places, I haven't been to yet So much I've got left to do So one more night dark and out on my porch A glass of wine to calm the nerves All these memories that used to be What's a phone call away? What do I deserve? What do I want to learn? What can I let go? What's the point anyway? The point anyway How about I sing this song? How about I sing this song Hear the sirens ring, somebody's going through shit somebody not too far away is gonna fail tonight And, if that's not enough to break your heart There's too many folks that are full of hate But, I still wanna be brave, I want to keep my cool I want to listen to you, I wanna get stuff right To speak from my heart, even days when it's hard Awake from the dream and I want to create
11.
Benefit Of The Doubt It was a late night, you didn't seem yourself Something wasn't right, got some fires to squelch Talking to me, and I'm seeming distant Not what you need, you're looking for something different I'm trying to give you the benefit of the doubt If you wanna pick a fight, I'll try to find another route I guess these are the demons I was informed about On a stormy day, I was just in the way The look on your face said that you're not okay Fighting a war that comes from your core No matter how we fight, no way to even the score I'm trying to give you the benefit of the doubt If you wanna pick a fight, I'll try to find another route I guess these are the demons I was informed about Don't know why you might go and turn tonight into a battleground go round for round you wanna explode tear apart this town Don't know why you might go and turn tonight something upside down run us into the ground You wanna explode tear apart this town I'm trying to give you the benefit of the doubt If you wanna pick a fight, I'll try to find another route I guess these are the demons I was informed about I guess these are the demons you were talking about
12.
Everlasting Low I'm gonna write a song about the ways of the world About my broken heart and how I lost a girl I'm gonna write a song, play it when I'm gone Play it for the sad folks, play it all day long I'm gonna write a song about all I got going on Sometimes it's hard to hold on, sometimes it's hard to belong The song is the song, if you want to sing along Sing it for the sad folks who tried, but got it wrong Oh the world, it has let me know That I should never let you go That I should never let you go
13.
Day After Day Day after day I hope and I pray that the words that you say are not to push me away Oh, day after day, day after day, day after day, day after day Day after day there's a price that I pay for the words that you say and the choices I've made Oh, day after day, day after day, day after day, day after day All the girls on the street, they look at me, I feel like I'm going crazy All the girls that I meet, say to cheat, and my mind's going hazy So, baby, day after day after day I say that I'm going crazy Yea, baby, day after day after day what'cha say I'm crazy
14.
Out Of The Past I saw your eyes and then I couldn't forget it You touched my hand, you know that I wanted it I wanted it Tell me something to take me away Start something new in a whole new place Tell me something, 'cause I don't know what to say Close my eyes and I just see your face Pretty girl what you do to me Pretty world what do you want me to be? A thousand things that I won't say to you A loss for words and I don't know what to do what to do In the room, can be a different man In front of you I'm doing all that I can all I can
15.
Loser (yup!) 03:27
Loser (yup!) Well, I know that I'm a loser And, I know you could do better I know that I'm a bum And, I know that I'm not the one But, damn it girl. Damn it, I love you Yes, I love you. I love you, I love you. Yes, I love you. Well, I know that I've got problems And, I know that you don't need 'em And, I know you don't need fixen' And, I know you gotta get your kicks in But, damn it girl. Damn it, I love you Yes, I love you. I love you, I love you. Yes, I love you. Every time we fall apart I am ready to make a fresh start And, every time we fail so hard Then we fail together, we sail together Because, damn it girl. Damn it, I love you Yes, I love you. I love you, I love you. Yes, I love you.
16.
Complicated Heart Rain begins to fall, another day is gone And another night without you in my arms You were lonely on the phone, has my voice lost it's charm? You're talking about your day, but nobody's home I know it's hard, but, we've come this far And, I'm trying to navigate this complicated heart I know you care and want to be there But, I'm trying to figure out this complicated heart For a start, before we fall apart Coffee and more beer, distractions from my fears I know we're not what you'd imagined we'd become We have got a love, but is it gonna be enough? Or, do the burdens become too much to forgive? Yes, it's hard, but, here we are And, I can see you're trying to figure out a complicated heart Oh, yes you care, but, this ain't fair But, we can try to figure out this complicated heart For a start, before we fall apart What do you like? What do you love? When can you say you've had enough? Will we fight tonight? Or, try to get it right? When does the hope become out of sight? I know it's hard, but, we've come this far And, I'm trying to navigate this complicated heart I know you care and want to be there But, I'm trying to figure out this complicated heart For a start

about

All of these tracks were recorded on a digital recorder. There's nothing fancy here, just songwriting and a little guitar playing. All songs were written between August, 2012, and April, 2014.

credits

released August 3, 2015

All songs written and performed by Jason M. Renslow, All rights reserved.
All photos taken by Jason M. Renslow. Thank you to my cats, Mr. Casual and Knedliky.

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Jason Renslow Eugene, Oregon

singer song writer. Bands: Original Oregon Underground, The Junkyard All-Stars, Piece Corpse, Poisonous Demon Cobra, and International Werewolf Connection.

One song, Come on Over Let's Chant, was selected for the Human Revolution Songs of Freedom Mixtape, Vol 1. Influences include alt country, metal, punk, folk, rap, rock, indie, electronic.
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